Korrektor - Egyetemi magazin - egyetemes értékek

Medical science says that casual sex is unhealthy. First of all, because of the myriad of sexually transmitted diseases it can cause, to say nothing of the unwanted pregnancies it can create. Unfortunately, although most of the sexual actions are started as life-long relationships, they end in breaking up with all of its bitter and devastating feelings of being emotionally burnt out, helplessness and depressed. These well known signs of psychological consequences of being left alone – a feeling often set in the focus of literature, music and other forms of arts of any period of the human history – are caused by the changes that sex exerts in the brain.

The brain systems that motivate humans to form emotional bonds, in particular monogamous bonds between pairs, are evolved from motivational brain systems, similar that
stimulate the behavior of the mother with her baby. Studies examining the mechanisms underlying the formation of pair bonds in monogamous animal species have provided significant insight into the mechanism of social bond formation. Approximately 3–5% of mammalian species are monogamous, including the prairie vole that has been most extensively used to study the mechanism of adult pair bond. In this species a preferential bond is formed between pairs of breeding females and males. Males in almost all of these species contribute to parental care of the offspring as in a good family. They aggressively ward off potential sexual rivals, similarly females, when they become pair-bonded, have aggression against other females.  
Researches, not only in prairie vole, but also in humans show powerful chemicals are released in the brain during sex that should create a powerful, everlasting bond.
One very potent brain chemical, which is considered a "reward signal", called dopamine.  When humans do exciting and rewarding things, dopamine floods the brain, producing a feeling of well-being.  It is dopamine that gives us a charge of excitement and rewards us for having the courage to take an action with an uncertain outcome. It should be noted, however, that dopamine is values-neutral.  In other words, it is an involuntary response that cannot tell right from wrong, or beneficial from harmful – it rewards all kinds of behavior without distinction. Dopamine can make us feel good about taking both good and bad risks, from being in a football team or in high school musical to driving too fast or having drug or sex.  
Oxytocin is another important brain chemical that helps females bond with other people.  When a mother breastfeeds her infant, for example, oxytocin floods her brain.  The effect is powerful, so she feels a strong desire to be with her baby, and is willing to suffer the sleepless nights and inconveniences that come with having a baby. Oxytocin also helps females bond with men.  When a woman and man touch each other in a loving way, oxytocin is released in her brain.  It makes her want more of that loving touch, and she begins to feel a bond with her partner.  Sexual intercourse leads to the release of even more oxytocin, a desire to repeat the contact, and even stronger bonding.  But, like dopamine, oxytocin is values-neutral.  It's a chemical reaction, an involuntary process that cannot distinguish between a one-night stand and a lifelong soul mate. Oxytocin can cause a woman to bond to a man even during what was expected to be a short-term sexual relationship.  So when that short-term relationship ends, the emotional fallout can be devastating, thanks to oxytocin. Another significant characteristic of oxytocin is that it produces feelings of trust.  That can be good or bad, depending on the situation. While the hormonal effect of oxytocin is ideal for marriage, it can cause problems for the unmarried woman or girl who is approached by a man desiring sex. The warning is that a woman's brain can cause her to be blindsided by a bad relationship that she thought was good because of the physical contact and the oxytocin response it generates.    
Oxytocin plays less significant role in males, since they have their own neurochemical related to bonding: vasopressin.  It floods the male brain during sexual intercourse, causing him to feel at least partially bonded to every woman with whom he's been intimate.  If men begin a pattern of having sex with partner after partner, they risk not developing the ability to form long-term emotional attachment. The inability of a man who changes his partners to bond after multiple liaisons is almost like tape that loses its stickiness after being applied and removed multiple times.
According to these above, oxytocin, vasopressin and dopamine work out well for couples out to create lifelong marriages and stable families. But that bonding, which acts like adhesive tape, is weakened when people tear away at its power by breaking off with a sexual partner and moving on from one to another. So when it does finally come time to bond permanently with a spouse, the ability to bond is damaged. The validity of this is reflected in the statistics. Adolescent females in the USA who begin sexual activity at age fifteen to nineteen will have, on average, over seven sexual partners during their lives (even if the experiences are quite bad), while those who maintain their virginity until age twenty-one will average two sexual partners during their lifetime. Since having fewer partners (preferentially having only one partner) is associated with a greater ability to connect and, ultimately, a more fulfilling marriage.

Science now backs up what religious traditions have been teaching for generations, namely, humans are the healthiest and happiest when they engage in sex only with the one who is their mate for a lifetime.